Posts Tagged ‘human transformation’

Re-Wilding the Self -1

May 7, 2010

The nails of my fingers
leave claw marks
in the soil of life
from my clinging on
to what is familiar
and comfortable and no longer
serves that which is awakening
within something is stirring
an impulse perhaps
the lid of an inner eye lifting
a vision turning in on itself
the Earth embodied in this body
her waters — my blood
my bones — her rocks for a time
this breath, inspiration and
expiration, are hers too.

The forests of her skin breathe me.
My lungs yearn to suck in
this new identity and own it
call it mine
fit it into the smallness
of my life inside a briefcase
sell it for a living
beside the Waters of Life
on whose banks we all reside
villagers — in whom something lives
not our own
the consciousness of the cosmos itself
looking in the mirror
waking up to its own
terrifying beauty and wonder
while my fingernails
leave claw marks in the Soil of Life
clinging to the remnants
of the smallness of who
I once thought I was.

“The world is changed.
I feel it in the water.
I feel it in the earth.
I smell it in the air.
Much that once was, is lost
for none now live
who remember it.”
— The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings, movie, Galadriel

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Resources:

Rewild: Fostering the Rewilding Renaissance

Note: I do not know where this series on rewilding is leading. My intent is to follow the game trail with focus for 30 days, to keep the posts short and inspirational and to add links of resource as I am able. I will collect and publish a collected list of links to books and web resources as this series closes itself so please send me any that you would like to share and I’ll do what I can with them.

Also, please feel free to contribute your own suggestions, tips and comments as to your own process for what supports you as you reorient your life toward thrivability for all.

Growing Roots Into Earth

April 22, 2010

Aspen Grove Root

One of the opportunities and challenges of our time is that of rooting ourselves into Earth and Cosmos, of re-membering the source and nurturance of our being. This re-connecting of self to our wholeness is also the grounding of a vision of thrivability worthy of pulling us into a future worth dreaming into being.

Following are a series of quotes for this Earth Day that have to do with the rooting of ourselves back into Earth, with remembering our innate belonging.

“Life has always seemed to me like a plant that lives on its rhizome. Its true life is invisible, hidden in the rhizome. The part that appears above ground lasts only a single summer. Then it withers away—an ephemeral apparition. When we think of the unending growth and decay of life and civilizations, we cannot escape the impression of absolute nullity. Yet, I have never lost a sense of something that lives and endures underneath the eternal flux. What we see is the blossom, which passes. The rhizome remains.

Juniper Root Reaching for Life

In the end the only events in my life worth telling are those when the imperishable world irrupted into this transitory one. That is why I speak chiefly of inner experiences, amongst which I include my dreams and visions.” — Carl Jung, Memories, Dreams, Reflections, pg. 4

“Oh, what a catastrophe, what a maiming of love when it was made a personal, merely personal feeling, taken away from the rising and the setting of the sun, and cut off from the magic connection of the solstice and equinox! This is what is the matter with us, we are bleeding at the roots, because we are cut off from the earth and sun and stars, and love is a grinning mockery, because poor blossom, we picked it from its stem on the tree of life, and expected it to keep on blooming in our civilized base on the table.” — D. H. Lawrence

“My roots are connected deep into the ground, engaged in a continuous interplay with the soil, bacteria, microorganisms, fungi, insects, and water, gathering nourishment to help me thrive.  My leaves and branches dance with the wind, the sun, with animals, birds, insects, microorganisms, bacteria, all in continual flow. My body returns to the soil and is soon transformed into new life. And so the cycle continues.

Juniper Cracking Rock

A thrivable entity is one that is richly and dynamically interconnected into its ecosystem, engaged in a process of continuous co-creation. The upward spiral…” — Jean Russell, from her blog Nurture: Making Our World Thrive at nuture.biz

This co-creative stance in life that Jean writes of, this upward spiraling of an integrative complexity and wholeness, is grounded in the reality of Life’s reciprocity and its consequent preference for strategies of mutualism. Mutualism is an evolutionary symbiotic strategy of wellness, hardiness and wholeness that can incorporate both competitive and cooperative hinging between species and individuals, resulting in ‘mutual benefit.’

Evolutionary biologist Elisabet Sahtouris writes of such relationships in EarthDance, identifying the principle of “mutual consistency” as essential to cooperative bonds of vulnerability and trust. I like to think of this as “mutual coherency.”

Mutual consistency or coherency arises when we are willing to treat ourselves and the ‘other’ not as transactional objects, but with the respect inherent in transformational relationships: i.e. we are willing to be changed by the interaction, to come out of it different in identity in some way than when we entered into it.

It is through such mutualistic relationships with a myriad of bacteria and fungi and insects… that this Juniper was able to crack open the boulder in the photo, from along the Chama River, NM, USA. And it through our re-membering our of our place in the network of Life that we too will again grow roots into the earth, and thrive, along with all our relations.

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The Once and Future Human

April 13, 2010

If the gray water snake can crawl out of its skin
on a summer day along the banks of the Pecos River,

If the singing katydid can shed the confining protection
of its exoskeleton in the juniper tree outside my window,

If the caterpillar in my garden can spin a cocoon and
become a gelatinous goo following some impulse
into the future of molecular transformation into butterfly,

If the ocean can be found in a rain drop
or a rain drop birth itself out of ocean,

If a bar-tailed godwit can fly 7000 miles from Alaska
to New Zealand over open Pacific waters without stopping and
no lunch or beverage but listening to some internal compass within,

If the aspen trees in the Sangre de Cristo Mountains
can shed leaves and their branches that no longer serve
growing new ones that do,

If the star eyed newborn baby girl human can carry at birth
within her tiny being the grandmother of generations,

Who is to say a man cannot be born anew,
twice born now the consciousness within
awakening to itself and the wholeness of Life
realizing the interconnectedness of all that is
within itself?

Is this not the story shared by all the traditions of mystery
wonder and awe that this self has its inter-being only within Self?

And that letting go of all one knows
honoring the willingness and courage
to not know — to at last not name and define
to cease reading the maps drawn by those
who live under the spell of answers and knowing
and trust at last…

Oh Yes!

There is already another map within
revealing ecological lifescapes of whitewater rivers
high mountain passes and quiet summer meadows and
vast plains of tall grasses and thirsty desert washes
of dry gravel and of springs and oasis too…

and a path—

a path known to only the walker
self-revealing only as he walks…

listening…

to the awakening wholeness
that is not his
but lives—a gift within.

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But for Lao-tzu…

February 23, 2010

It is true.
I now know less than ever,
less than nothing—I suspect.

This is surely
some kind of dying—a death even
and some kind of birth too; perhaps.

The domesticated ‘I’ would hope so.
And to that clinging too…
even hope is now slipping beyond me

This letting go of every thing
so tenderly vulnerable
story and self-as-object dissolving

as silence melts terror
into a not-knowing so open
now at last knowing

What is it to simply be
with no-thing to prove
everything to embrace

this contraction  into awareness
and this expansion into being
ancient cycles of self renewal

surely such a beginners mind
as this last re-birthing of the Universe
I Am.

But for Lao Tzu I would think myself crazy. And but for Rumi too. The two of them… and so many other souls who have honored and lived the wild out in their lives, whose living presence yet points toward a way of being whole. I’ve previously written of Rumi’s Two Kinds of Intelligence, one which serves us in the domesticated living of our lives ‘among men’, and another through which we are connected to all of life and to mystery itself.

But for the domesticated human, if you are like me anyway, that transitional space between the need to ‘make one’s way in the world,’ and that surrendering into fully trusting Rumi’s innate “fountainhead” of intelligence residing deeper than acculturation… that is the space where I find myself asking: “Can Life be trusted?”

Rumi answers with this line from My worst Habit:

“There is a secret medicine given only to those who hurt so hard they can’t hope.”

And Lao-tzu? I rest more fully into the trusting of Life when I sit with him:

Not-knowing is true knowledge.
Presuming to know is a disease.
First realize that you are sick;
then you can move toward health.

The Master is her own physician.
She has healed herself of all knowing.
Thus she is truly whole. (71)

It is from this wholeness that I seek to live and to write; the resiliency that resides in this place, unlike the domesticated world which would define us by our knowing, I experience as being like water:

The supreme good is like water,
which nourishes all things without trying to.
It is content with the low places that people disdain.
Thus it is like the Tao. (8)

Nothing in the world
is as soft and yielding as water.
Yet for dissolving the hard and inflexible,
nothing can surpass it. (78)

The gentlest thing in the world
overcomes the hardest thing in the world. (43)

Thus it is I live more wholly in the un-knowing of an open mind and an open heart, for surely their gentleness and their wild resilience is like that of water, saying “Yes!” to all it encounters. Imagine a world where corporate and national sustainability policies were informed by the wild intelligence and un-knowing of water!

Notes: The Lao-tzu translations are by Stephen Mitchell, Tao Te Ching. The Rumi quote is from The Essential Rumi, translated by Coleman Barks with John Moyne.

Running from a Post!

November 24, 2009

I seem to be running from a post! The thinking within it is waking me in the darkness while the moon is now set; the emotions within the writing will not let me sleep.

Yet I run. I am afraid. Like Jonah perhaps, one of my favorite childhood Bible stories, am I running from a god of my own and fears of my own creating too?

I have no excuses. Are there ever really any that justify our not living fully? Not arriving into the belly of our whales with courage to face the darkness?

Is this darkness that is spread upon the land of my own creation? People losing their homes to Bankers we ourselves finance. Husbands and wives and sons and daughters and fathers and mothers returning from wars haunted by nightmares… if returning at all? Oceans choking in discarded plastic and human relatives on the Tree of Life dropping… falling from the grace of existence while the costs of health care and clean energy are debated….

And yet… and yet I am both afraid to look at this human world of my and our creation… and intrigued and fascinated with it. We are living, as one friend says, during the most exciting time of the movie: the climax. Will we make it? Will I make it? Will you?

I only know my heart must grow larger if it is to hold this world… and my own humanity. This wondrous power and mystery of choosing Life — is too grand to fit in the small container of a little self. Yet this being digested in the belly of my whale… is this where we all are?

Are digestion and composting and gestation and transformation really all that different?

What shall we give birth to then?

This night, I shall start with compassion, compassion for this self and Self I inhabit, and for all my relations, all here within as well.

The Experience of Oneness

September 14, 2009

“Open your hidden eye and come,
return to the root of the root
of your own self!”
— Rumi

I was privileged at the recent Power of One conference to co-facilitate, with Sister Jenna Maraj of the Brahma Kumaris Meditation Center of Washington DC, two free-flowing round table discussions on The Experience of Oneness.

As the flier for the conference says, “The Power of One refers both to the recognition of an interconnected universe and the power of one individual to influence the whole. The new synthesis of science and spirituality reflects a universal understanding of the cosmos and consciousness. As humanity moves to ever higher and broader levels of understanding, we meet in the silence in which we experience oneness and emerge to take action out of that place of unity and peace.”

Clearly anyone drawn to such a conference already carries within a conscious reference of experience of unity and Oneness. Thus it was natural that a background question for our round tables was this issue: “How do we work with the blocks, the resistances, to the experience and knowledge of humanity’s belonging and Oneness? What are the sources of such resistance?

We might have spent days exploring these questions… but our brief time allowed for only a few other questions and observations to emerge:

How do we come to feel comfortable with our own peace? What are the practices that support such?

The practice of Oneness requires ‘homework’ on ourselves… it is often precipitated by a crisis of some kind. We often come to such knowledge through a ‘path of desperation’….

Interestingly, the Chinese character for crisis is also the character for opportunity. Is this not where we are collectively now?

This question and issue of the role of fear arose and someone asked, “How do we get rid of fear?”

I found myself responding with a yet different question: “How do we come to live with fear as an ally and teacher rather than as a predator and parasite?”

Sister Jenna grounded our table with the simple and always profound question of, “How are you feeling right now?”

“How are we feeling? Are not all of our world problems rooted in feelings? And how can we come to be present with our feelings if we are not comfortable with silence? If we just sit here together in silence for a moment… everything changes….?”

“What would it take to create an event similar in magnitude to 9/11… but of a positive imagery… that again gifted the world with the experience of unity and Oneness? What are the images we can use throughout the coming year to provoke this feeling of Oneness?”

With the asking of this question I felt completely at home, for I have written and spoken extensively about our need for vital and dynamic living system images of wholeness. In the blog post, A Celebration of the Self: Wild Resiliency!, I wrote about the convergence of my passions for personal, organizational and social change being captured with this principle from restoration ecology: If you want to help a system change, if you want to help a system move toward wellness, you support it in reconnecting to more of its self, to more of its wholeness.

This is the principle behind the restoration of predators, such as wolves, to our forests. It is the principle behind the restoration of fire regimes to our tall grass parries and western forests…. And it is the reason I play with the idea of Aspen-Body Wisdom, believing the Aspen grove and tree to be ‘medicine for our time’; it is because we are more like the forest than we are different from it. And in particular, the aspen grove can teach us of what it is to be wholly human, of what it is to be a human self, and how to thrive in turbulent times.

So if you want a good change and hardiness strategy for your business or self or nation… go sit in an aspen grove for a few hours and listen. Let your soul find the deep silence. Let your self open and feel… smell the crisp mountain air and listen to the quivering of the aspen leaves in the breeze. You, like me, might just hear them whisper in your ears too:

The realization of Oneness

is the most viable change and hardiness strategy available to us

– as trees, as individuals, in business, and as a nation.

Note: We’re offering Take-a-Hike! Aspen walks through the fall here in Santa Fe, where you can re-member how to perceive yourself and the world forever differently.

“The River Knows Everything; One Can Learn…”

August 5, 2009

Grand ReflectionsThis last Grand Canyon raft trip was my sixth; my first of twenty-one days length however. All previous trips were of eighteen days in duration.

This last trip was the most difficult and arduous of all I have taken. More on that perhaps in a later post. But of all the trip-returns I have made, and I have made perhaps fifty wilderness trips of two weeks or longer in length, this last return has proven the most difficult as well.

There is an understanding among many who work in the field that we might call wilderness or experiential education, and I think the same is true of all who are worth their salt, whose work involves guiding people through change processes or ‘altered states’ of consciousness, that it is the bringing people home that is the critical part. Yes, bringing them home ‘safe’ is vital, but also supporting them in bringing their selves home in concert with the magnitude and depth of their experience, bringing them home to the ‘normal realities’ of our living while also holding on to and integrating the mysteries and wonders of being experienced while on their journey.

This is no small challenge, this coming home… to ourselves… our Selves, if you will. For the whole point of our pilgrimage is to touch the numinous, to be reminded and to re-member and re-story our selves in a way that is perhaps more coherent with the deeper realities and currents of Life. At least such motives stir in me… often when I take a simple hike in the mountains… but always when I partake of an extended wilderness outing.

So it is not surprising that I might come back from a twenty one day rafting expedition… a different man, a different self in some way. That was after all a desired intention. I’m just not sure that I have yet or ever will return from this last river trip, or that there is even a ‘self’ anymore who might return.

T.S. Eliot writes, in The Dry Salvages,

“I do not know much about gods; but I think that the river
is a strong brown god—sullen, untamed and intractable….”

And then lines later he continues:

“The river is within us, the sea is all about us…
…The sea has many
voices,
Many gods and many voices.”

I am discovering many gods and many voices within me too. But always there is the river within, sullen, untamed and intractable. So perhaps one reason I’ve not fully returned is that some part of me is yet listening, yet looking, yet thinking I should know something, have some insight into the nature of Life to share… should know now and at last how to be in the world….

Surely there is only One God! One concrete object self-soul that I can name and know myself as.

Instead, I know less than ever. The self I thought I was is being washed and worn and Larry on Grand.JPG copyeroded away. There is less here than ever to hold onto, less than ever seeking to hold on. I can no longer untangle the river forom the sea or the sea from the river. This freedom of perception is taking on a subtle and vibrant tangibility yet…

What might be reveled is yet around river’s bend, is yet below the rapid’s horizon of view and all I know to do is wait. be patient. be at one with the river. breathe. be ready. laugh. let go of all I think I know. open. feel the current in the depths of my being. listen to the water sing it songs…

It feels like a great and wondrous… dream… I am the river… or perhaps it is the river that is… dreaming me?

“I am only a ferryman and it is my task to take people across and to all of them my river has been nothing but a hindrance on their journey. They have traveled for money and business, to weddings and on pilgrimages; the river has been in their way and the ferryman was there to take them quickly across the obstacle. However, amongst the thousands there have been a few, four or five, to whom the river was not an obstacle. They heard its voice and listened to it, and the river has become holy to them, as it has to me. The river has taught me to listen; you will learn from it too. The river knows everything; one can learn everything from it.” — Herman Hess, Sidhartha

Communion — as a Strategy of Resilience

January 15, 2009

Communion

Many a thought
running through this 2AM mind
like children in a playground
each following a trail
of their own spontaneous desire
together and alone weaving
webs of patterns
mirroring how it is
we commune with the world
and the world with us
desire and fear
love
hope and aspiration
laughter and joy and tears
jealousy and greed
belonging and solitude
anger and hate too

but pomegranate seeds in the fruit
of our hearts deep longing
that once eaten of
become threads of vulnerability
calling us home to ourselves
if we but risk the play
of communing
of communion with all that is.

“The day came when the risk it took to remain closed in a bud became more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” — Anaïs Nin

“Relationships are all there is. Everything in the universe only exists because it is in relationship to everything else. Nothing exists in isolation. We have to stop pretending we are individuals that can go it alone.” — Margaret Wheatley, Leadership and the New Science

It strikes me that essential to our wild resiliency is the willingness to engage with the world in a spirit of transformation rather than one of just ‘transaction.’ In the former is the willingness to be changed; in the later is the commerce between objects.

To live Life in the spirit of relationship is also to live in the world willing to be transformed, willing even to risk—blossoming; therein lies our “communion with all that is,” beginning with the deep desires of our own hearts.

Gamble's Oak Leaf

Life: in communion and transformation

Turning 60—at 2 AM

November 1, 2008

Spanish Dagger Bud

Woke in the dark

thickness of night

hearing the call

my soul… my heart

“Get up! Wake up!”

gently but urgently repeats

Until I sit now

Breathing

Listening

Cat a-purr in my lap

Stars brilliant all around

My soul calling out for itself:

Wake up

Open your eyes

Be a strong heart

A true heart

Live your joy

Dive deep.

Spanish Dagger Blossom

Spanish Dagger Blossom

A Time for Inner Stillness, Healing and Connection

October 29, 2008

“The Mayan Prophecies speak of November 11th, 2008 as a time of great emergence, of moving into the “Sixth Day”. This new day will be a very fruitful time in preparation for the great galactic alignment of 2012. We are currently in the very darkest hour of the night before the breaking of the dawn. We must be vigilant and attentive without engaging the world with drama. Now is the time to heal ourselves and our culture, to reevaluate and reexamine all belief structures, to cull what needs to be shifted and to allow ourselves to be renewed and reborn with this approaching new day.

If we do not complete this process of purification and healing, the breaking down of old structures, this breaking down will happen at the literal and physical level. The year 2008 is the “shakedown year”. We must bring our power and attention to examine what no longer serves us. We must be dismembered and walk with ethics in the world. The prophecies foretell that the individuals who take this leap will rise out of the creative juices of the rich, dark mother earth and flourish….”

“An essential practice for any transformational process is stillness. Breathing techniques are used around the world as a tool to guide us into this deep place of stillness -  the place where we can touch infinity. As the world spins with confusion and fear, it is important to spend time each day connecting in stillness and silence. In this place, we touch infinity, where we are no longer bound to the painful stories from our past, and our future is no longer scripted by our history.”

excerpted from The Four Winds Newsletter, October 2008

Alberto Villoldo: The Four Winds Society

“By my mid-twenties I was the youngest clinical professor at San Francisco State University. I was directing my own laboratory, the Biological Self-Regulation Lab, investigating how energy medicine and visualization could change the chemistry of the brain. We were able to increase the production of endorphins, the natural brain chemicals responsible for reducing pain and for creating ecstatic states, by nearly 50 percent utilizing the techniques of energy healing.

One day in the biology laboratory, I realized that my investigation had to get bigger instead of smaller. The microscope was the wrong instrument to answer the questions I was asking. I needed to find a system larger than the neural networks of the brain. Many others were already studying the hardware. I wanted to learn to re-program the system. Anthropological stories hinted that there were people around the globe who claimed to know such things, including the Inka in Peru…”

Alberto brings to the field of shamanic studies his grounding in western science and healing…. I have heard him speak, read some of his work and listened to a number of lectures… and highly recommend his work.

I first addressed the larger topic of shamanism’s relevance to resiliency here: Resiliency and Shamanism.

Shamanism is also one of the blog’s ‘catagories’, and related posts can be accesed through those archives.

Note: I updated the post in response to a question from a reader, see comments.